Taming Fear
As you are reading this we have been in an official Pandemic for weeks and weeks. We have been confined to our homes and asked to stay 6 feet away from each other whenever we have to be around others. We don't know the duration of this condition nor do we know how long it will take our family, company, community, country, and the world to recuperate.
We do know that life will be different. There will be a new normal. I know you know this. It is challenging. Very challenging. And yet, it's the little things that are shining through right now. They are finally getting the attention they’ve deserved, and we’ve neglected for far too long due to our busy lives.
The simple things become dear to us when we are dealing with ongoing challenges in our everyday life. Things like baking fresh pumpkin bread, the soft sounds of animals and nature and even our cozy socks that are hiding our lack of a pedicure.
On the other hand, challenging times can create a caldron of boiling frustration and anger that seems to have no end. It's okay to feel this way. It’s okay to not feeling thankful for those socks or the birds constantly chirping outside the window. It just isn't healthy to stay marinating in these feelings. It harms our beautiful nervous systems and damages the relationships we have with our loved ones. Trust me here. Been there and done that.
I want you to know that if you don’t want to be overcome with that second set of feelings and if you want more for yourself, there is something you can do. Start by putting a name to your fears. A fear named is a fear tamed. It is fear that creates anger, frustration, resentment, and overwhelms. You can unpack those fears by making a list of them - getting them out of your head and onto paper. So, start by making a simple list of all your fears by completing this phrase, "I am afraid of ____”.
From this list choose your biggest fear and imagine a worst-case scenario regarding it. When doing this exercise with clients I prompt them by asking, "What are you afraid will happen?”. Followed by, “And then what will happen?" And we continue with this for a while, bringing these possibilities to life. I keep asking this question until we get down to the core.
What I’ve found is that most of us are deeply afraid of "getting dead”, not actually dying. It is the way we get there that terrifies us and is usually linked somehow to our fears. When we can speak it out loud and allow ourselves to work through the worst-case-scenarios then we find where we can take control and feel our power in the situation.
After you’ve imagined or wrote down your worst-case scenario, ask yourself, “What can I do to survive this worst-case-scenario and better yet, even THRIVE?”. Remember, it isn't what is happening to us that takes our power away, it’s how we choose to respond to what happens.
I think you’ll be surprised to find that just through the simple act of identifying your fears and giving them a name, you’ll be well on your way to taming those fears. Acknowledging your fear does not make you weak. It makes you courageous and that is freaking strong and sexy.
That’s it for today’s #ReLTalk.
P.S. - what anyone else thinks about you and your behavior is none of their business. What you think of yourself is! Be gentle with yourself as the web of confusion is lifted and you become even clearer on how to get what you want for your life. It will require you to know and practice the things I teach on this blog but you can do it! You’ve got this and I’ve got you!
SEEKING SUPPORT FOR YOURSELF OR YOUR TEAM?
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Consider hiring me to create a workshop or custom coaching engagement to help your team, leadership team connect to their unique best self. The outcome is discovering their confidence, energy, and focus. After two decades of working in the corporate arena, I still find most of us do not know how to structure a lifestyle that supports our goals and dreams. To reach those we must learn to be our best. Bring our best work and attitude. We have to take personal responsibility for who we are and how we choose to show up in life both business and personal. Inspiring others to connect to this part of themselves and turn it into action is my magic. I’d love to discuss how I can support your LEADERS. Learn more here.
Could you use time and space to focus on yourself? How about accountability to follow through on that desire? The CHOOSE YOU! Virtual women’s circle is created for just this purpose. The desire to take better care of the inner self was present in my life, however everything else seemed to take priority until I discovered the practices that I share through CHOOSE YOU! We meet 2x a month in the evening. Want to join us? Email [email protected] with the subject: “Tell Me More! Choose You group” and I’ll reach out to let you know when our next gathering is scheduled. Learn More
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